Leading Through Difficult Times

It was February 14th, 2018. We were half way into our third quarter in my first year as high school principal, and it had already been one heck of a year. As if the transition to a principalship isn't enough in and of itself, we had a bomb threat on Day 4. Day 4, folks. That investigation alongside a slew of unanticipated adult behavior in the neighborhood had made my first semester rough. Over winter break, I didn't wash my hair for five days. However, I put on a brave face to the world. You have to prove yourself that first year in any leadership position. My staff didn't know I was human just yet. 

It started as a normal day like any other. We greeted kids at the gate, and got students safely to class. We were probably checking email or making plans for interviews when the news hit. There had been another massive shooting - this one at a high school. I knew immediately that the landscape of our second semester was about to change.


​Aside from the typical re-evaluation and reinforcement of safety procedures, and trauma support for students, we caught wind that on April 20th, the anniversary of the Columbine massacre, students across the nation were planning to walk out of school. My heart sank, as it so often does when it comes to student safety and civil liberties. I have a responsibility to protect these kids and to ensure that they develop into responsible citizens as well.

Fortunately, our student body is amazing, and through open lines of communication (and a lot of legal consult) we compromised and decided to stage a walk-in. Students would be permitted to leave class at 10:00 a.m. - the approximate time of the Columbine shooting - and walk silently alongside staff members to the football field where we would hold silence for 208 seconds - one for each school shooting victim in those students' lifetime. Everyone was safe, and due to proper planning, we had a police presence to reinforce the safety and well-being of all participants. It was a moment where you swell with pride, and where you want to fall to your knees in pain. 

Two years later, I have a whole book of stories I can tell, but during these days of quarantine, my audience looks a little different. In fact, when the memory of the student walk-in showed up in my Facebook memories today, I could hardly reconcile the similarities of how I felt then versus how I feel today. Although adversity may take on different shapes and sizes, at its core, it all truly the same. How do I choose to lead through difficult times? I stand in awe.

---

I stand in awe at this expansive world made smaller by unity, and difficult decisions made easier through hugs and heart. If you want to know where I stand, I stand in awe. 

Facebook post from April 21, 2018:

The world is constantly asking, "Where do you stand?" As a teacher, as a principal, as a citizen, "Where do you stand?" After cautious and careful analysis, my response came to me today.

I stand in awe of my students as they articulate to the student body that they have never lived in a world where Columbine, Sandy Hook and Parkland don't exist Where you are trained to "play dead" when you hear a gunshot and hide behind locked doors. For 208 seconds of silence, I cried and I stood in awe.

I stand in awe of my teachers, counselors, paraprofessionals and support staff as they grapple with difficult decisions all centered around a heart for kids. The sleepless nights and caffeinated mornings . . . I can never express the immense gratitude I feel for each of you. Every child. Every day. I stand in awe.

I stand in awe at this expansive world made smaller by unity, and difficult decisions made easier through hugs and heart. If you want to know where I stand, I stand in awe. 
​
One thing remains true in each of the aforementioned situations. Whether we are leading young adults through a walk-in or leading an entire household, school, or community through a pandemic, we need to appreciate the awe of the human experience and the depth of hurt one is able to feel. We need to believe that everyone has the best of intentions, even when words hurt and their chosen coping mechanisms sting. We need to take a step outside of ourselves and look more globally at the world around us, standing ever so slightly off to the side, in awe of God's people and this beautiful earth. If you want to lead through difficult times, why not stand in awe?

Linger a Little Longer:
1. Consider your stance on the issues of today. How do you stand? Does your stance need to be modified? Why or why not?
2. How can assuming a posture of awe and wonder support you in other areas of your life? Is there a benefit to choosing to see the awesome nature of the world?
3. When might it be difficult to stand in awe? Identify one situation in your current life that makes your skin crawl when you think of twisting it into a positive. What is one next step you can take to improving that situation today?